Saturday, December 15, 2012


And now, the gradual lengthening of days, rather than the primal darkness of an approaching winter. It is effortless--the planet's tilting--but is registered here through some elemental knowingness. Oh, how I have treasured the snug twilights and the bright, ephemeral days.

Gone (or nearly so) are the scarlet ovals of the Callery Pears and the lemon-light on the Florida Maples, both of which I would get out of the security truck to touch, as if to imbibe their hues. Someone would stop and ask directions to the movie theater, and I would point to this immediate resplendence. "Oh yeah," the driver would dryly offer. And I'd smile at his unknowing eyes and give precise directions to the cinema.

In Barnes and Noble, I get water in the cafe. At one of the tables sits an attractive and diminutive American Buddhist nun, working at her laptop. As I'm leaving, she glances up at me, frowns acutely, and then re-focuses on her ancient Dell. Is it my security uniform? Or does she know me from my books and blog, and sees me as the anti-Buddha? 

But I am not anti-anything! And further, "There is no multiplicity here," as the advaitic scriptures rightly posit, despite any appearances to the contrary, whether they be man and woman, or Buddhist nun and very ordinary guy. All is Presence.

Outside, gunmetal clouds extend from horizon-to-horizon.

Flicker of remembrance. Another solstice: I loved our balcony in Montreal, just off Boulevard St.-Laurent. The entire alley, three-stories below, lay plumed with snow. On our first morning, as you showered, I stepped out onto the ebony grate that was adorned with alabaster wedges from the midnight storm. Gingerly, I cupped my coffee to warm my hands and thought of you inside--the water caressing every part of you, just as I had done throughout the Siberian night.

We had eaten at Schwartz's Deli, to nourish your "starved Jewish roots," you joked. You had some kind of medium-smoked meat on rye, and I an egg salad sandwich, of which I only ate half--for I could not stop gazing at you...Our break-up was as benumbing as the air that I was feeling on that arctic balcony--the arguments, the separation, and then the heart-wrenching, single-line email: "You should know that I am now seeing someone else."

I pause to search for that decade year-old pain...and not a scintilla can be found--only the full memory of the event itself. No flutters of heartache or angst. That kind of attachment is gone for me now. Multiplicity has ceased, though still appreciated--even reveled in! It is a kind of Love after love. But this one is unceasing, impersonal, and wholly without measure. And It never disappoints. Right here and now, peer into your very own wonder. Absolutely no one can give you that.


News & Info

This blog appears every other Sunday.


Fully Present is now available at the superb Powell's Bookstore, in Portland, Oregon. 


Fiona Robertson interviews Rodney on Nic Higham's NONDUALITY NETWORK!


Click HERE to buy Rodney's Fully Present: Daily Reflections on Nonduality from Amazon.


And click HERE to purchase Fully Present at Barnes & Noble.


And go HERE for the press release for Fully Present.


For Tami Brady's review of Fully Present in TCM Reviews, go HERE.


"Fully Present is an elegant addition to the growing literature on nonduality as it is being uncovered, lived and understood in the modern West."

--Philip Goldberg, author of the best-selling American Veda: From Emerson and the Beatles to Yoga and Meditation--How Indian Spirituality Changed the WestPhilip's Web site can be found at


"Rodney Stevens opens his daily life and thoughts to us in these immensely natural and pleasant ramblings of one who is fully engaged in life, love, nonduality, and cinnamon muffins."

--Catherine Ann Jones, award-winning screenwriter, spiritual workshop leader, and author of The Way of the Story: The Craft and Soul of Writing. Her Web site is


Rodney is also the author of A Vastness All Around: Awakening to Your Natural State, a powerful and elegant collection of essays, discussions, interviews, and powerful pointers. It can be ordered directly from the publisher at Lulu Press.


For the book's Press Release, click Here.


Check out Rodney on YouTube talking about "The Fundamental Thing."


Feel free to read a review of the Kindle Edition of Vastness on Amazon


Nonduality Magazine has published a discussion with Rodney about his work and book. The extensive and wide-ranging interview was done by John LeKay, the magazine's editor.


"I like your approach in A Vastness All Around. The stories, thoughts and vignettes of your life seem wonderful ways to make people stop and pay attention to where they actually are right now, rather than in some imagined past or future. They show that you don't have to be some specially qualified person, preferably with a title and a name in Sanskrit, to pursue the spiritual quest. Your message comes across particularly well in such pieces as 'Sheerness of Being.'"

--Valerie J. Roebuck, Ph.D., Honorary Research Fellow, University of Manchester (England)


I am now doing phone consultations via Skype! Each conversation will take about an hour, and a $25 donation will be greatly appreciated.

I am also scheduling teaching events at this time. If you would like to arrange something in your area, you may email me at: writerguy (at) fastmail (dot) fm


This blog is generally updated every other Sunday afternoon, Eastern Standard Time.


agoraƩagora said...

Hi, Rodney

"It is a kind of Love after love."

as always
your words fall
like snow flakes
and melt quietly

Thanks you for your writings,
I love you,
you know.


Rodney Stevens said...

Much love to you, too, my dearest Rejane. :)