Q&A: To the Breach

Question: Hello, Rodney. I live in Columbia (SC), as well. It's great to see there's someone in town who shares a common grounding.

Rodney: Thanks for taking the time to write. You are the first Columbian I've met who has had any interest in nonduality. It tends to hold little appeal for spiritual seekers--particularly here in the Midlands (which we call this particular region to the state, blog readers)--because nonduality points to the fact that there is nothing to "achieve," only to understand. Most seekers would rather strive, suffer, and even grovel rather than see what is directly in front of them. Their battle cry could well be the same as Shakespeare's Henry V: "Once more to the breach, dear friends, once more."

Q: "Or close the wall up with our English dead."

Rodney: Very good!

Q: Thanks...Like you, I've been on a spiritual path for a lot of years, beginning with Buddhism and then moving on to books and recordings by Eckhart Tolle, Nisargadatta, Ramana, Byron Katie, Ramesh Balsekar, Gangaji, Tony Parsons, pretty much everybody. I've been immersed in Adyashanti's teachings for the last year.

Rodney: How is it all going?

Q: I've had glimpses of Reality (forgive the language), some of them sustained for days, but more often they are slow to come and quick to go. I do know what I am (Awakeness), but I--Big I--seem to lose the living experience of that and then that body/mind/personality entity looms large again. In other words, the story moves back into the foreground. I imagine you understand what's I'm driving at. In essence, I'm saying that I do not have an abiding realization.

Rodney: Right, you don't yet have an abiding realization that you are presence itself. But your insights about the matter are, for the most part, honest, clear-headed, and well-articulated. And that certainly counts for something!

Q: I wonder if you experienced any of the above yourself and if you have any advice?

Rodney: I can empathize with you on a number levels: The years of searching, the exploration of the works by most of the writers you mentioned, and the sundry spiritual experiences (which include numerous blissful periods for hours and even days). But the operative term here is "periods." Not only did they not last, but they were "experiences" of joy and peace, i.e., mere semblances of them. And there was still the assumed-person having these experiences. As long as that assumption is there, there can be no deep and final understanding.

Q: Yes, I see what you mean.

Rodney: The ultimate state, as Nisargadatta points out, is your natural state. There is nothing to gain or to stabilize because you are It--supreme and knowing spaciousness. This isn't an experience, yet peace and fullness is vividly present. Those are simply two of the qualities of your nonconceptual essence. This fact can only be pointed to. You have to discover it for yourself. And this comes about through an actual seeing or understanding of who and what you actually are. Books, pointers, and talks can only take you so far. But you are certainly going in the "right" direction with all this, and I commend your earnestness.

Q: I will try to just witness the experiences as they come up.

Rodney: But that "I" would be an additional witness. You don't want any notions of an entity remaining, however faintly. Just see that whatever experiences arise (whether joyous or quiet) are born from and already witnessed by a felt-spaciousness that heretofore has been overlooked. Indeed, it is a spaciousness that is so clearly apparent that it is missed by 99.99% of all spiritual seekers.

Q: Alas, I am one of them.

Rodney: That is simply how things appear right now. Continue to move beyond the experiences, knowing that you are the presence of awareness from which they arise. For the experiences themselves, however captivating, are of little importance. I tell seekers that spiritual occurrences are basically on the same levels as dreams, about which, ironically, people still love to discuss or to relay the most intimate details. Awareness is neither an experience nor insubstantial. It is a genuine presence that is both unchanging and unarising. And you can discover this for yourself in the blink of an eye.

Q: As always, many thanks!

Pointers

In nonduality, you are the answer.

*****


Pause a moment and see if you can discern the difference between consciousness (your general sense of awakeness) and awareness (that unchanging, beginningless presence behind consciousness). It is such a simple thing to do. If the recognition doesn't occur, don't berate yourself. Just come back to it at some later point, when you can see things anew.


*****


Once presence is recognized, it is more real to you than your body and breathing.


*****


I have no teaching of my own. I merely speak from a stupendous lineage of nondual writers and speakers whose words and books point clearly and unerringly to our natural and ever-present state. Those teachers include Shankara, Huang Po, Nisargadatta Maharaj, "Sailor" Bob Anderson, and John Wheeler. My only original aspect is my perspective: How I can to this understanding, and how it is for this particular body/mind to be lived while reveling in Beingness.


*****


Ironically, the so-called "mature seeker" is the person who sees what is glowingly apparent, not what is complicated, conceptual, or supposedly time-ladened. And that what is apparent is our ordinary, everyday awareness.


*****


When no thought is there, what is there? What is it that remains?


*****


Yoga--which was developed in India over 5,000-years ago--is a rich, elegant, and efficacious practice of asanas and breathing exercises that increase and maintain mobility in your joints, muscles, and even deep tissue. Yoga is not, however, a path to self-knowing.


*****


Don't turn your seeking into a quest or pilgrimage. There is no special place that you need to go to understand who and what you are. Awareness is everywhere, and it is resplendently apparent. Further, you are That, not the limited-person and mind that you now take yourself to be.


*****


Stop a moment and feel the spaciousness from which your previous thought arose.


*****


Wisdom doesn't come from the ability to be still. It comes from seeing that you are stillness itself. Those who teach that you must be "adept" at "entering" your "inner Self" are completely wrong. You are supreme awareness. Given this, you now know that before you indulge in any meditating, "resting as awareness," or forced periods of silence, you are staring squarely into and at your very own peace and clarity. Nothing needs to be attained, and there is no one to attain it.

Q&A: The Ultimate Truth

Question: I love your non-duality blog. Thanks for the excellent pointers.


Rodney: You're certainly welcome.


Question: I have a question about one of your recent blog posting. You mention to the person who contacted you that there is no person to perform the practice of "resting as awareness." I understand what you are saying here. However, you also say "Responsibly address all concerns."


Rodney: Yes, there needn't be conflict--in the idea or actuality--of being a compassionate and conscientious citizen and being self-realized. Nisargadatta Maharaj certainly was an excellent example of that.


Question: Oh, yes. I whole-heartedly agree. And yet--


Rodney: Right, saying that there is no person and to responsibly address all concerns appears to be a contradiction. But that contradiction is only from the mind, which struggles to reconcile the two views and can't. Why? Because the bare truth of this cannot be seen conceptually. For the mind's notions about itself include, among other things, that there is a individual thinker present, that thoughts are derived from the mind itself, and that ideas and mathematical formulae are the "highest" that man can go, philosophically speaking.


Question: It's interesting that you mentioned mathematics. I'm a scientist at a major university.


Rodney: The contributions in those fields of science and mathematics have been enormous. But the ultimate truth, which we are concerned with here, is the presence of awareness, which is our natural state. That's one of the great good things about nonduality: You already are that which you are seeking. Recognizing your natural state can essentially done in two ways: Apperceiving this presence within you or coming to a mental and intellectual Full Stop (as Sailor Bob Adamson so winningly pulls it) in the presence of a potent pointer, which could be statement, a work of art, a smiling child, some natural setting, a strand of music, some breath-taking constellation, or the sound of a lone temple bell.


Question: So instead of focusing on some ever-looping mental issue, I should just center on what is happening at the moment?


Rodney: Not quite. The attention should be on the simple presence of presence, not on any events or occurences that may be going on at the time. And with this comes the realization that, among other things, you are being lived, that there is no longer a "you" living a separate and autonomous life. And with this understanding, you naturally and easily continue to live as responsibly as possible, as a citizen in whatever country you choose to live.


Question: I have heard certain teachers advocate "Resting as Awareness." In each case, they clearly point out that at the beginning it will appear that there is an entity resting as awareness, but they explain that this is a fiction. They have found that this is an effective way to get people to quiet the mind and its obsession on phenomena. I know there is legitimate disagreement on whether this is the best approach. It seems you advocate a direct seeing - as opposed to a process that matures over time.


Rodney: Yes, I point to direct-seeing. I'm not really an advocate of anything, nor am I in opposition to any specific teacher. But I see what you are saying. My pointing and teaching is certainly not in sync with most present-day teachers. But that just happens to be the case. I'm not attempting to be oppositional. I'm merely speaking from the nondual lineage of Nisargadatta Maharaj, Sailor Bob Adamson, and John Wheeler, among others. And these teachers are unassailable. Also, I'm writing from what I have come to know, which is that you are awareness proper, and that you need no time or "maturing" to realize that fact.

Question: I really appreciate your detailed response. It was very helpful. For I really want to get to the bottom of this, so to speak.


Rodney: To ask who or what you truly are is the most vital question you could ever ask yourself. So I applaud your wanting to discover the immediacy of all this. At "bottom" and in plain view is this magnificent ground of Beingness. That's the open secret that is being pointed to here, as well as at other credible Web sites and blogs.


Question: Thanks again. Your sincerity and love are certainly shining through in your blog.


Rodney: All the best, and feel free to keep in touch, if the spirit moves.

Pointers

Awareness is the only "I" there is.


*****


You have overlooked awareness, giving priority to your body, mind, and senses. So work your way backwards: What is it, right now, that is not your body, mind, or senses? See that there is a subtle, yet boundless presence that has always been in evidence.


*****


Forget all methods and concepts. Simply understand what you are at this very moment. I say "what" because there is no who. I say "this very moment" because no time is needed to recognize what you already are. All of your conjectures, entertainments, and philosophizing amount to nothing more than a kind of excuse-making--which is perfectly fine if you only want an academic understanding of Self, rather than a living one.


*****


Don't bother with trying to "let go of thoughts." How is that going to help you? Thoughts are just temporary appearances in your bare and unchanging spaciousness. Thoughts certainly have their purpose, but they are not what you are. Bring your attention to that which is between each thought. There you will find your ever-present treasure.


*****


"I thought" really means "There was the awareness of a thought." That awareness is you. It is the expansiveness in which that particular thought appeared. Bring your attention that presence and you may immediately perceive that there has never been a moment when you weren't Knowingness itself.


*****


Unity Consciousness is just another name for your natural state.


*****


See that the personal pronoun "I" does not stand for any individual entity. It is the cognitizing spaciousness that is within you and around you. Indeed, it is nothing but you. Its recognition annihilates all doubts, questions, and seeking. And you will wonder how you could have missed for all of this time.


*****


Awareness radiates through all states and experiences. Ironically, it is so easily overlooked because it is so vividly apparent. Just a moment of attentive seeing or understanding is all that is needed to clarify what is already present.


*****


The ego is no defined thing or entity. It is only your temporary sense of an individual self.


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Close your eyes. You will immediately note that there is a definite presence of boundlessness and freedom. Now slowly open your eyes, continuing to feel what was there in the darkness. See that that sheerness and presence unwaveringly remain. That is it. That is what you are!

Q&A: You Are Lived

Question: Hi, Rodney. A friend recommended your blog, and I happily checked it out last night. I immediately resonated with your lovely words and clear pointers.


Rodney: Thank you. The writing comes naturally and quickly, though never without revision!


Question: One of the things I like about your message (though that probably is not the correct word) is that you don't say that it is all just a dream.


Rodney: Yes, I have problems with the dream analogy--though this classic, Advaitic angle is not without merit. It's just that it tends to confuse sincere seekers when the "it's all a dream" speech is tossed about so casually by meditators and teachers who have no inkling about what they are saying. As I type these words, the traffic-sounds are certainly there, and the dark, morning rain is beautifully falling. But they are all appearances in awareness, in what you are. Events, people, and occurrences (whether they are labeled tender, noisy, passionate, annoying, loving, terrible, astonishing, etc.) are dreams in the sense that they only appear to be wholly separate things and activities. In truth, all is awareness. There is no separation anywhere. When water--for whatever reason--becomes a wave, it is still water. That simple little fact pretty much says it all. An added point: Some people try to skirt a society's laws and customs by saying "it's all an illusion--do want you want to do." My take is: Responsibly address all concerns, and see that your body/mind is being lived, that there is no individual person there. In this way, your life will automatically be filled with compassion and understanding.


Question: Thank you for clearing that up!...I've desperately been trying to gear my life towards seeing who and what I am. I am currently doing the practice of "resting as awareness" with [the name of the organization].


Rodney: How is that going?


Question: Well, I have been practicing this for over a year, and more and more there is pervading sense of immense peace. However, suffering still does come up for me. From your and John Wheeler's sites (and even others that I recently perused), it seems to be what you are saying is that this self-realization can happen pretty quick and there are no real practices needed. If this is so, I would like some help with this.


Rodney: Quickly is only the way that it can happen. There is nothing to work towards or gradually develop at all. It is sudden seeing or understanding that not only is awareness fully present, but that you are It. You are that awareness. As I have often said, your natural state is simply being overlooked. Indeed, its immediacy cannot be overstated. It is closer to you than your thoughts, body, breathing, and consciousness. Though you may have periods of calm and apparent peace, those periods, by your own admission, are quite temporary. Ironically, it is your practice that is keeping you from seeing what is already vividly present. Spiritual methods--however elegant, powerful, and well-intentioned--bring with them a clear host of problems. The central one, of course, is who exactly is attempting to practice? Can a thought, belief, conviction, personality, or body/mind rest as awareness? No, none of them can rest as anything! They are inert, temporary appearances in presence, in what you already are.


Question: Okay, I understand that much better now. No "I" or ego can rest as awareness. But where do I go from there?


Rodney: Where does who go from there? Permit yourself to be truly paused by that question. It is not at all a rhetorical one. It is clear and accurate pointer to your natural and every-present state. Further, the next time you find yourself paused by anything (whether it be a sentence, a work of art, a piece of music, or some gorgeous natural setting), allow that pause to go deeper--or rather, see that it actually (and timelessly) deepens itself into felt-awareness without end.


Question: And it is then when suffering stops?


Rodney: How could it not? You have discovered that you are Existence itself, rather than a mere body and mind. Suffering occurs when you have a certain image about yourself, which includes the "I am now enlightened" self-image! One additional point: Even when one's understanding is radiant and unwavering, events and issues (including physical pain and discomfort) still come up. But they are dealt with far more effectively: Responses tend to be swift, full, and accurate because there is no "one" doing them. Emotions are still there, but they are no longer a weight or a problem. For now you see, as Buddha so beautifully stated, that "it is our very search for perfection outside ourselves that causes our suffering."


Question: Thank you, Rodney. I'm deeply grateful! I am sure that I will be writing you again soon. I hope that's okay. I would so love to meet you for coffee, but I live in Toronto!


Rodney: Feel free to write anytime. And I love Canada. So I'll definitely take a rain-check on the coffee!

Pointers

You are awareness proper. How can you possibly practice to be yourself?


*****


Waking, sleeping, dreaming, and even deep sleep are states of consciousness that come and go. What is the background from which consciousness emerges? It is Beingness itself. It is what you are as you peruse these words at this very moment.


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Witnessing is not something that you practice. It is your very nature. You are the seeing.


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Right now, there is a presence within you that is completely untouched. It is vivid, formless, and free. There is nothing you need to renounce, and there is nothing you need to attain. It is directly before you, as well as within you. It is simply being overlook.


*****


Back up! Back up! There is an unwavering sheerness beneath and throughout your various states of consciousness.



*****


To whom can this understanding occur? It can't be your body or thoughts because they have no self-reflective qualities. Thus, the recognition happens to no discrete or separate entity. You are that. You are the understanding. There is no "enlightenment" of absolutely anyone.


*****


Seekers are quick to follow popular and/or dynamic teachers because the teachers' words all too often support their sense of a self, e.g., they will be able to achieve something (liberation) with something (their minds, bodies, beliefs, convictions, practices, etc).


*****


Behind all prescribed practices is a conceptual "me." That is why methods can't help you. Yet, you persist in your endeavors. The years and decades go by, as you sit, chant, meditate, and observe your thoughts and sensations. It's all for naught, of course. On the other hand, your ultimate state is your natural state. It is right here, right now. It brims with peace and radiance. Take a moment to see this for yourself. And all seeking will be over.


*****


When no thoughts are present, You are present.


*****


Where is the who? Look carefully, and all you will find is spaciousness. Any thoughts or sensations that come up are not only temporary, they are constantly changing. Your essence, then, has be something that Does Not Move. So look again: Where is the who? There is no who--only sheer, naked awareness. It is so quiet and so ordinary. And yet, its magnificence can never be put into words. So go ahead, see it for yourself: Utter Beingness without end.


*****


Enlightenment/Liberation/Self-Abidance are simply loaded terms for your natural state. Thus, it isn't something for which you have strive. Nor is it anything that needs to be integrated or maintained. Those who would tell you otherwise are simply not self-realized themselves. Some of these so-called teachers are even attempting to appropriate nondual terms and language in a desperate effort to hold on their "disciples," who are slowly wising up to the game that is being played upon them. But such "gurus" and teachers quickly reveal their almost comic shallowness after a few, tepid utterances or responses about self-knowing. When you've had your fill of their facades, know that you only need to ask yourself one simple question: Where is the who?

Q&A: How Am I Not My Body?

Question: Hello, my friend. Please keep writing. Your blog is a nondual joy.


Rodney: Thank you. Sailor Bob Adamson pointed out the truth to John Wheeler, and John pointed it out to me. So I wanted to keep the ball rolling (after John encouraged me to speak about this) by pointing to our natural state in the blog you're reading. If something here resonates with seekers, that's terrific. If it doesn't, they should simply check out other sites from teachers who have an untainted understanding of who and what they truly are.


Question: I regularly go to three sites. But don't worry, I won't name names!


Rodney: Great! No names are necessary--only your clear seeing is the issue here. Whomever that occurs with is quite secondary.


Question: How is it that we are not the body? The very perception of sentience seems to take place in this body. Any help on this would be greatly appreciated.


Rodney: You are neither your body nor your thoughts. You are the awareness that is aware of your body and your thinking. If you pause and truly reflect upon this, you can easily perceive that that is the case. Further, you are aware of your consciousness, as well. Thus, awareness is your essence; it's that which never changes. Note that everything around you is in some sort of flux, whether it be quick or slow, dynamic or subtle. But if you look carefully, you will see that there is indeed a presence of awareness within and around you. It's a felt actually with no beginning or end.


Question: Yes, something in me knows that this is true as I read your beautiful words. I don't know what it is. Maybe that's what I need to figure out.


Rodney: It's not a matter of "figuring" out. It's a matter of seeing what is already there. For instance, the pauses between thoughts aren't blank at all. They are alive with peace, radiance, and freedom. They, quite literally, are what you are. But we have been wrongly taught by society that our thoughts, degrees, bank accounts, and professions are our identity. And we have been incorrectly told by spiritual teachers that our visions, experiences, and ecstasies are what we must experience or "achieve" in order to qualify as an "Enlightened Being" (which is yet another falsehood).


Question: I like what you said about the wave and the water in a previous blog entry. I seem to "get" that.


Rodney: Yes, that's a classic nondual analogy, as well as a fine pointer in itself. While every wave in the ocean is marvelously singular, each wave is nothing but the ocean itself. Water is its fundamental nature, as awareness is ours (actually, awareness is the ground of everything). But we, unlike waves, know that we are present.


Question: That's the sentience.


Rodney: That's the sentience. It's an aspect of consciousness that allows us to say that "I know that I am right here, at this very moment." The wave just exists; it can't reflect upon itself. But as sentient body/minds, we are able to utter, "I know that I am present, that I exists." Now, nondual sages and teachers say to take that statement (or the matter of sentience) to its ultimate: Not only do you know that you exist, you are Existence itself!


Question: Okay, I see that now--in my mind. But that's okay, it's clearer.


Rodney: Yes, though it's still a conceptual understanding, the point or issue is clearer. And a "correct" conceptual understanding can easily lead to a deep and living one. All that is needed is a bit of fine tuning, as it were. For Presence is ever-present. Sentient beings are merely waves on the water. There is no separation from awareness at any point or time. We are That...So just stay with the basics of this until your understanding is lucid and unwavering.


Question: Thank you, my friend. Here is my mantra for today: "Presence is ever-present!" I hope you are laughing. Still, it is a reminder that will be with me.


Rodney: I'm chuckling...Let the reminder come naturally, and you will be fine. Or better yet, explore the following: What is it from which the reminder arises?


Question: Ah, I must admit to resonating with the question more. Why is that?


Rodney: Why be concerned? Just go with it.


Question: I love your musical pointers. I would like to offer a few of my own in closing, if I may?


Rodney: Absolutely.


Question: Mozart's Mass in C minor, K.427 - the soprano solo during the kyrie eleison. There is a moment during the solo, as performed by Felicity Lott (on the Amadeus soundtrack), when she hits the highest note of the piece on the word "Christe". Hot dripping FULL STOP, that one! Another great musical pointer - Miles Davis "It's About Time" on In a Silent Way - when Tony Williams comes in full on with the drums after a long, long, long series of rim shots on his snare. FULL STOP. And here is a fine pointer from Miles himself -- "Don't play what's there. Play what's not there."


Rodney: Excellent list. Thank you. That declaration from Miles is particularly potent!