Monday, February 22, 2010

Q&A: Beyond "I Amness"

Question: I enjoy reading your blog. Please keep up the excellent writing.

Rodney: I appreciate that. Yes, the blog continues to putter along, though I can no longer actually see it (and other blogspot blogs) on my ancient iMac. So I go over to a friend's house on Monday or Tuesday to edit and post that week's piece on her PowerBook. That will probably be my modus operandi for the next year-and-a half. But that's perfectly fine. At least the blog is getting written.

Q: In the meantime, I'll send Steve Jobs an email and see if he's got any unused MacBooks lying around.

Rodney: Thank you!

Q: I have a question regarding a recent blog entry. Towards the end, you mention "a seeing with full awareness."

Rodney: Yes.

Q: I don't put too much weight into words, as they are only intended to work as pointers and are just concepts and can never be the real -- but that statement truly resonated with me.

Rodney: When you are genuinely paused by some pointer, piece of music, work of art, or everyday occurrence, you are often at a lost to explain it. The pause is there before you even realize it. Of course, this isn't like when pause yourself, which is a fine and "legitimate" nondual undertaking. But it sometimes isn't as potent as the former, where you are just, say, reading along and sudden-ly...Full Stop, as Bob Adamson rightly says. Again, you are
brought to a halt. You haven't participated in it in any way. The mental cessation is suddenly there, and there is this apparent opening to your natural state, which--of course--is always open and "available" to you. In addition, the opening is the seeing; and the seeing is a simple recognition of what is already fully present. And what could be more beautiful than that?

Q: It's beautiful indeed. I used to have glimpses of what I thought was the Absolute, but I came to realize they were just experiences and that there was still a perceived separate entity there.

Rodney: Good man.

Q: And I have clearly seen that I am not a separate being. Now, there is a true knowing, innately, that there is no one home -- and that has brought untold freedom into this life (of course the appearance will still offer up different experiences, but they are all seen for what they are - non personal).

Rodney: Yes, non-personal arisings, all. And this doesn't change with the cognition of one's true identity. Thoughts, sensations, and emotions still to come up. You may even find yourself briefly identifying with them. But it's of little conse-quence. For you've come to know who and what you actually are. And when that is recognized, it is
thoroughly recognized. That's why I would take issue with your saying that you have "clearly seen that I am not a separate being." When that understanding occurs, there are no more fundamental questions about the life, seeking, and the Absolute. But you are correct about your knowing "Innately that there is no one home." Indeed, your deep faith is quite apparent and comes through in your writing. I love that word, faith. Alas, it's be misused by religions and religionists. To a certain extent, faith is a belief. But even more, it is an unexplainable and inner-knowing that what is being pointed to is nothing but the bare and nonconceptual Truth.

Q: Yes, I see what you mean. Listening to John Wheeler, he mentioned that when you see beyond the "I Am", you are truly seeing that Conscious-ness is the play of life showing up on the Absolute (and made of the Absolute).

Rodney: Yes, that's correct. But don't just take John's beautiful words for it. See this for yourself. Don't allow your enquiry to wander into added quoting and conceptualization. And John would be the first to say this, by the way. For what he is pointing to is closer to you than your very own skin.

Q: So I'll just to stay with the fundamentals--that Presence is everything and can't be explained or known because that would imply I am separate from it. And that this Absolute is totally beyond the mind.

Rodney: And that
you are the Absolute. That is key. Right at this moment, you are That. Those are the potent fundamentals that point to your radiant and ceaseless reality.

Q: Right now, I know what I am not. But I also do not know the bare truth of what I Am.

Rodney: All that is missing is a clear and solid seeing of awareness itself. This understanding comes quickly and of its own. And what you will come to understand is something so beautiful, so timeless, and so ordinary that you will absolutely marvel at how you have overlooked it for so long.

Monday, February 15, 2010


Even the Psalmists urge, "Be still."


Yet, even stillness, silence, and sacredness pale in comparison to nonconceptual awareness, which is Absolute and has neither nature nor form. It is utterly transparent and forever cognitizing. And never, for one nanosecond, have you not been That.


There are no steps, stages, evolution, or spiritual "levels" to self-realization. Once this understanding occurs, it is fully known, in so far as it can be fully known. But what
is readily perceived is the sheer-clarity and immediacy of your natural state.


Smiling, Laughing, Loving, and Self-knowing all have one thing in common: No Thinking Required.


If you give emphasis to the mind, you are bounded by mind. See that all thoughts, doubts, and questions arise
within a subtle--yet magni-ficent--spaciousness that heretofore has gone unheeded. How unfortunate! For you are that! Just direct your attention there. Allow yourself to see and know the felt-presence of preeminent Reality.


To be conscious is to be
aware of your thoughts, environment, sensations, and existence. And you are that awareness, not consciousness. Why? Because consciousness--which, essentially, is a state of awakeness or alertness that includes dreaming, drowsiness, and deep sleep--changes. Thus, it can't possibly be who and what you truly are.


Pause...and find out what it is that
appears not to be there.


There is, of course, no one to awaken. "Awaken-ing" is simply a term or locution with which we use to communicate and to point to the inexpressible. Don't get overly concerned with words. They are, after all, only that: Terms of expression. The only time such terms become a priority is when some compassionate soul is attempting to direct you to your inherent Reality.


The mind can't be "emptied of the 'me'." That's one of those spiritually-bizarre statements that are bandied about by false teachers who want to sound authentic or impressive. The mind
is the "me." Thoughts, concepts, reasoning, and the sense of being a separate self are all arisings of that function that we label the mind.


what you are. You are awareness proper. Pause right now and look for it. You won't find a thing--that is, before the next thought or sensa-tion appears. But that no-thing was you! You...Are...That!

Monday, February 8, 2010

Q&A: Clarion Call

Question: Hello again, Rodney. I'm really glad that the "Falling from Error" posting has gone down so well with people.

Rodney: It has indeed. Your bright and polished insights about your own questions and seeking greatly moved a number of readers. My part was small: I just corrected a few issues, and re-focused your attention on that which has capti-vated you from the start: Awareness itself. You already have a strong and intuitive "feeling" for this. It's just a matter of your seeing it clearly.

Q: Yes, to see clearly--though at times, it appears (at least) a bit overwhelming. I'm just a Notting-ham housewife who, at moment, has a lot of time to herself. I've long had these spiritual questions and concerns. I rather enjoyed the works and residentials of Tony Parsons. But of late, I have been earnestly exploring your and John Wheeler's interviews and writings. And I must admit, this feels very much like home to me. I am really at a lost to explain it.

Rodney: There is no need to explain. When you resonate with someone's pointing, a deep and indescribable feeling is there. It's a connection, of a sorts, that is both pristine and eternal. In short, presence is caressing presence. This is one of the reasons for your occasional (and lovely) upsurge of tears.

Q: In last week's blog entry, you touch on a point that really resonates with me. You're right -- I have had the hope/expectation/imagining of an Event, a "Something" That Will Happen when I somehow stop being me or change into a better me or see the world entirely differently or become everything....I'm sure they are all the usual variants that our minds entertain.

Rodney: Yes, they are simply notions we have about this supposed event. We've gathered these assumptions through the years (even decades) from thoroughly incorrect spiritual books and teachers who claim that "Enlightenment" is, among other things, bliss, rapture, visions, catatonia, psychic powers, personality shifts, etc. It's none of those, of course. It's not even "enlightenment," which infers a condition or a non-natural occurrence that must be achieved or entered. On the other hand, a direct seeing or understanding of your natural and ever-present state involves not a single step away from who and what you are at this very moment.

Q: And yet, there is this apparent awakening that occurs, as with your silent, Big Bang-like experi-ence and Tony Parson's walk in the park.

Rodney: Yes, but it's much more of an appercep-tion (a perceiving with full awareness) than an awakening. But "awakening" is easier on the brain and tongue. So it is readily used, which is perfectly fine.

Q: Could you talk about that "non-event" a wee bit more? Not yours, personally, for I know you are loathed to speak about it much anymore.

Rodney: Everyone comes to this recognition differently. But nearly most agree on the hush-ness and the ordinariness of it. But it certainly has extraordinary aspects also: The peace, the translucency, the spaciousness, and the ever-present "OM" that reverberates through your Beingness (at least with this body/mind). I now see why it has been used as a mantra by seekers for thousands of years. One of the most common definitions of OM is that it is the name of God. When your seeing is clear, you will note not only how apt that name is, but how powerfully it points to both God and awareness, which ultimately are the same thing. A more accurate and telling definition of OM is that it is a primordial sound within--not
of--awareness. But again, early seekers and facile teachers went the imitative route: Chant OM, and you will "become" OM.

Q: And, of course, nothing happened.

Rodney: Nothing but headaches, leg cramps, and chronic frustration. But if you were to take a moment to look deeply into your own stillness at this very moment, you might very well be privy to the utter obviousness of your innate and eternal "song." And though this is a little difficult to put into words, you will also find that there is no apparent difference between OM and your boundlessness. One could just as well be the other. But I digress...

Q: Actually, that bit of digression is apt -- for I just listened to the second-half of your interview on Urban Guru Cafe the other night, which made me really laugh in parts --especially the bit about people going to India to try to "get it" at Nisargadatta's place, as if by osmosis. For years, I've felt that going to India to "find oneself" is a kind of denial of one's own innate wisdom.

Rodney: Right, our subjective Light and wisdom is already shining. Indeed, its radiance is
so clear that one could easily overlook it. And that, precisely, is what is happening with seekers the world over. When I meet with people, I some-times give the following analogy between light and awareness: Light can only be seen when it strikes an object, such as tiny dust particles. Similarly, awareness can only know itself in conjunction with consciousness. When we recognize our natural state, awareness is recognizing itself. Thus, peace, clarity, and freedom are genuine, nonconceptual attributes of our natural state. But we wrongly think that we are our bodies, beliefs, thoughts, genders, ethnicities, occupations, and even souls (i.e, an eternal "me" that is destined for either Heaven or Hell). We are awareness proper, not the manifestations within it. Just sit with this and allow yourself to truly see the magnificence of this brief, straight-forward statement. Again, you are awareness proper, not the appearances within it.

Q: It shall be my clarion call for at least a fortnight! I'm joking, of course.

Rodney: I sort of figured you were...No, contemplating it with your next pot of red bush tea will suffice quite nicely, thank you.

Q: Or I will hear the kettle whistle, and that will be the end of it.

Rodney: And what a fine and proper end it will be.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010


How can you hope to attain something that you already are?


One of the reasons that you are struggling with nonduality is that you are thinking of it in terms of an occurrence or an event. Or even as a feeling or an experience. But it is completely
beyond the pinnacle emotions of joy and happiness. It's even beyond love. So any attempts to utilize or "align with" specific sentiments or conditions will be of no help to you.


Deep sleep is far superior to any blissful or ecstatic experience. For deep sleep is deep rest. And it is completely natural. During deep sleep, awareness is still present. But there is nothing to witness: No thoughts, no dreams, and no bodily perceptions or sensations. We literally die a sweet death every night. We even crave it, because it is the
only thing that gives us such peace and rest. But you can know that which never sleeps or dies at this very moment. Discover it for yourself.


You are both employing a false perspective and giving an undue weight to life when you say that everything is perfect or that everything is terrible. Events are simply occurring as they are occurring.


When you start your spiritual exploration with yourself (as opposed to suspect notions and hear-say), you end with yourself. For there is
literally nothing in between: No path, no person, no process, and no journey. It's just a deep and instantaneous perceiving of your natural and nonconceptual essence. This recognition is, at once, no-frills, hushed, and extraordinary. It can only be pointed to or hinted at, and never fully described.


You are a living embodiment of Truth itself. You are simply overlooking your natural and ever-present state. But that's not your fault, entirely. You have been taught by family, mentors, teachers, and spiritual counselors to see yourself not only as an individual, but as individual with an X-kind of car, y-kind of job, and z-kind of subur-ban life, all of which go to only increase your sense of indivi-dualism. But the good news is that you are awareness proper. All you need to do is see this for yourself.


There is no Original Sin -- just Self-forgetfulness.


In your daily activities, take a moment to note this sheer-like
presence that is already in the forefront of your life. Allow this moment to come of its own. And it surely will, given that your natural state is nothing
but that unbounded peace and capacious-ness. Heretofore, it has simply been passed over by cursory thoughts and shifting emotions, which you imagined were immediate and vital, but were not.


Clarity and contentment
are nonduality. This great teaching is nothing less than a felt-reality from which you are never absent. It only appears that it is something for which you have to search or attain. But nothing could be further from the Truth -- which, ironically, is the very same thing that could be said about yourself at this very moment.


When you are told to look for your mind, what is the first thing you see? Stillness. Spaciousness. Nothingness. A wayward thought or idea comes up a few seconds later, and
that precisely is the mind (or at least an aspect of it; for the mind is simply a group of functions which include memory and reasoning). Now, go back to the stillness. Allow it to present itself, as it were. This does not actually happen. For awareness does not move, and it is already fully in place. But its sudden recognition can sometimes feel like a kind of "shift" into something. But really, you attain noth-ing at all. This is just an instant understanding or apperceiving (i.e., a seeing with full awareness) of that which has always been in noble evidence.